Wednesday, November 21, 2012

FLY ON THE WALL


He: Welcome Madam Secretary
She: My pleasure your highness

He: And how was the trip to Cambodia?

She: A most suitable decoy milord. Thank you for this week of distraction
He: Never mind we will be well paid. You will sink deeper into debt for it, but we will be well paid.

She: The press has put Petraeus on the back burner. Our people love a war more than a sex scandal.
He: Do you really think so? Have you forgotten the Jewish girl so easily?
She: I have no need to remember her. I don’t even remember her name. But my true love proved that a cruise missile provides more romance for our people. Those 70 he fired at Jalalabad after the bombing of the embassy in Nairobi, I have learnt a lot from that. This pretty boy you would rather not see was such an innocent, but I have taught him well.

He: I had so hoped you would get through those primaries. My people stood firm, but too many don’t want a woman to lead. We are light years ahead of you. Every country in the world will have a female leader but not yours.  I fear you will always remain a backward society living it up while you are waiting on everyone else to bail you out. The Chinese? Goodness, the Chinese? You hurt me Shiksa.
She: Backward?  The most progressive society on earth?

He: Yet half of your people wanted to be stuck in the 18th century with that moron, sorry mormon. You were saved by immigrants, Hispanics, blacks. At least you can be honest about that.

She: We are going through a difficult time, but we are a strong people, we will weather the storm
He: Speaking of weather…

She: Forget it, forget it (holding her fingers to her temples)
He: How can I? All this carbon we have put into the atmosphere these past few days, all that dust and rubble that Palestinian children must inhale. It not so kosher right? I cringe when I think what they are drinking for water. I cringe everyday when I think of how they live. That refugee camp in Khan Younis. How do they even survive? We are going after them before this ceasefire you know. They run to Khan Younis to avoid our fire power, but they can’t hide. I cringe more at what that klutz Bushwa did in Iraq. Three miles of the Tigris on fire in one night. Bushwa makes my interior minister sound like a sissy when he says "We must blow Gaza back to the Middle Ages, destroying all the infrastructure including roads and water." I bet you never read that in the New York Times. But we know you share that dream too.

She:
Your pre-election fun is coming to an end?

He: Not so fast, let me enjoy it. When I am finished my people will be so afraid no else can save them.  They may even mark “for life” on the ballot next to my name
What’s the hurry, two months to go. I could put the fear of death into my people and let them think it is those hoodlums from Gaza with their godzilla rockets. We show the same 10 over and over on television, we let the siren scare them. When they are hiding in the tunnels they don’t know that 20 godzillas and 20 from the iron dome you paid for make up 40. They don’t know the difference between a $40,000 intercepting nothing  falling near to them and a $1k godzilla.

She: You use Iron Dome to ….. you are wasting our money like that?
He: Our money Madam, we are working hard for it. What is a mere $40,000 to give ourselves a reason to kill a few barbarians?

She: Don’t say barbarians milord, we are insisting on “terrorists”.
He: You are insisting? I start a war to give you a reason to bring three warships in the Med, and you are insisting? How will you get supplies to Syrian rebels………
She: Quiet, walls have ears

He: Not my walls Shiksa… You failed your poster boy in Benghazi big time Madam Secretary.  You don’t want to show a hand in Syria so he paid the price. Now the world knows Madam and you tilt your head in the air and walk.
She: Don’t get personal

He: I say what I want Madam, you need me more than I need you. You think we want your Caterpillar bulldozer to go into Gaza. We could use our own. We just need to remind them that you are with us every step of the way.
She: When you are ready let me know, I will talk to our allies

He: Allies…hahahaha………..poor Saddam.... hahahaha...Hosni....hahahaha.......Pahlavi.....hahaha....Abdullah your turn is coming....hahahaha